Potty Training – No More Battles for Control
By Shelly Walker

Toilette training seems to take up a lot of parents’ attention. Yes, potty training is a big deal. No, it doesn’t have to be a months-long process. Or a battle. If you approach your child (and the potty) in the right way, it is a natural, coming-of-age step that can – really! – be enjoyable for you and for your child.

Toilette training is not about the toilette. It’s about control. Your child is learning to control her body. The reason that the bathroom becomes a battleground is because parents mistakenly think that they are in control of the situation. Let that idea simply disappear. Your toddler is now in control and accepting that will eliminate the battle.

For parents, potty training is about learning how to support their children in the fight for independence. It’s imperative that you choose to stay on the right side of the battle lines, or your child’s self-esteem will suffer.

Okay, so how does a parent support his or her child, without engaging in a battle for control, and still get the job done?

• Wait until the time is right. You can begin to talk about the potty at an early age, even at one year, but do not put your child on the toilette until he asks. He may be three years old before he’s ready and that is perfectly fine. If you try to force him into training before he is ready, he will resist and your relationship will suffer, his self-esteem will suffer and your peace of mind will be destroyed. You will know that the time is right when he shows a real interest in the toilette and he is showing control over his body.

• Prepare her by keeping on a schedule. By the age of one, your toddler should be on a regular schedule of eating, sleeping, playing and having diaper changes. These regular diapering times will prepare her for a regular bathroom schedule in the future. This doesn’t mean that you have to maintain a rigid schedule for years, but she should know that she has a regular, natural pattern to her day. This sets her up to succeed when the time is right for potty training.

• Do not spend weeks and months see-sawing from diapers to pull-ups to underwear. This is so confusing to children and it simply destroys his feelings of self-esteem. (It’s okay to use pull-ups at night for a few weeks while he’s working on his physical control, but do not use them during the day.)

• When he’s ready to use the potty regularly, simply get rid of the diapers and put him in underwear. If he piddles on himself, he will see that it is uncomfortable and yucky and he will most likely not do it again. Really. If he does have an accident, DO NOT SHAME HIM: simply allow him to be responsible for cleaning it up (with help) and changing himself. Allow him to experience the natural consequences of wetting himself.

• Reward her for going on the toilette. It infuriates me when I see parents being taught that their children should not be rewarded for going on the toilette because it’s what they “should” do. Put yourself in your child’s world: your two- or three-year-old does not know that the toilette is where she “should” do anything. She has quite happily been pooing in her pants for years now – and all of a sudden you create a different expectation for her. If you want her to succeed and be happy about it, reward the behavior you want to see. I have used a simple, small candy reward with great results. For peeing, she gets one M&M, for a BM she gets two. Stickers are a great option for those families who do not like using food as rewards.

By waiting until the time is right, rewarding the behavior you want to see and not shaming him if he does get it “wrong”, you are building your child’s self-esteem and empowering him to succeed joyfully. No more battles. Happy child. Happy parents. It’s that simple.

Straight talk from the mom who has been where you are and knows how to help your family: Shelly Walker is the mother of two beautiful children and the author of Awakened Power and the upcoming book Parenting Keys, which will be filled with conscious parenting tips and parenting advice. Shelly is passionate about children and believes that every child deserves healthy, happy parents. Her website has great parenting information and free tools to help parents raise successful, empowered children. For a free copy of The Top Five Parenting Challenges: How to Succeed Where Others Fail, go to http://www.ParentingKeys.com.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Shelly_Walker

Best book for toddler years and Potty Training

Potty Training Advice for Any Parent

By Lisa A Mason

There are many challenges you will face as a parent but one of the hardest for many parents is potty training. Whether you’re a first time parent or already have older children, potty training can be a real challenge. Here are some tips and information to help you approach this important milestone in your child’s life with more confidence.

When to Potty Train

One of the most commonly asked questions regarding child toilet training is when to start training. There is no exact age to begin this type of training because every child is different and will develop at a different stage. Most parents give it a try around 2 years of age. If your child is showing interest before their 2^nd birthday, you can feel free to try some introductory training.

If your child goes past 2 years old and still doesn’t seem interested in the potty or learning to go potty, don’t push the issue. You can always try it and if your child isn’t ready, put it on hold and try again later. Studies have shown that trying to push toilet training too early can actually hinder the process for many children.

You should look for signs that your baby is ready for potty training such as showing interest in the toilet or when other people in the house go, taking their diaper off, telling you before they go in their diaper or when they go, expressing discomfort when going in the diaper, etc.

Potty Training Boys

You might want to take a different approach when training boys than with training girls. Every child is different but statistically, boys usually train at a later age. Your boy can learn to urinate standing or sitting, whichever is best and most comfortable for him. If your boy prefers one way over the other, it’s best not to try to force him to do something different.

Potty Training Girls

When potty training girls, you need to teach your girl to wipe properly from front to back to avoid infection. You will also need to help her do this until she’s big enough to do it on her own. Many girls learn well from mimicking or through dolls and other training devices. While the saying often goes that girls learn faster, you shouldn’t think there is anything wrong if your daughter is a bit behind the average.

Potty Training Tools

There are many potty training tools out there available to help you and your child. While tools alone will not replace good parenting support and tactics, they can make it easier for you and your little one to get through the potty training process. You should know that these tools are not requires and you can certainly train your child fine without them but they can be useful.

If you have certain tools at your disposal that can make the process easier for you both, it just makes sense to use them.

Some potty training tools include potty training charts, special potty seats such as musical potties, potty training books and more. Not every child will respond to every type of training tool so you might want to experiment with some different ones and see what works best.

For some additional tips, remember to keep your child’s clothing as easy to get on and off as possible during potty training. Buttons and complicated fasteners can be too hard for a young child learning to go. Sharing toilet with siblings or parents can help a child learn to go faster. Spending time in a bare bottom instead of with a diaper on is also helpful for many.

Now that you have these basic tips for potty training, you can go into this parenting mission prepared. If it’s your first time or you have multiple children, you will have the confidence you need for successful potty training.